True love never dies. I know that sounds very cliche but on my recent trip to Maryland to visit my grandparents, I realized the truth to this. After my parents divorce, I still visited my grandparents at least once a year. I loved going to my big family Thanksgiving’s at their house. All the grandkids would always be together playing different hide and seek and capture the flag games. I remember the Friday after Thanksgiving we always had a big family football game.
Throughout the years, I loved going and spending time at my grandparents house. They would always take us to Congressional Country Club which, which was around the corner, to swim and we loved it. It was always the same, my grandpa was grumpy but we loved him, he always said we brought too much luggage ( and we did), and my grandma was always smiling and at the end of the day, she’d say “Connie’s kitchen is closed.” These little things I took for granted up until now.
I admit, I had lost touch with this side of my family for quite some time. Once my grandma was diagnosed with Alzheimers when I was a teen, I got scared and wasn’t sure what to do. The last time I had seen them she asked who I was in the airport. This was right before my real dad moved overseas for good and from that point on our visits and talks were scarce, if any.
My grandparents fell in love in college. They fell in love young, and soon started a family with nine kids. I know that it was hard for them because my grandpa went off to war and some of the older siblings had to help the younger ones grow up. The stories that were told from when they were all younger made you laugh till you would cry. Their love has lasted over 50 years and it is still going strong.
This past weekend, I had the honor to fly to Maryland and visit where I had once grew up. The feeling I got when I was driving to my grandpas house from the airport was kind of a lost one. I missed being there, and I missed the times I had there. I knew that this visit was different than the rest. My grandma has recently been moved into a home for patients with Alzheimer’s and on a good day she remembers both my grandpa and my Aunt Barbara. It felt lonely in his new downsized house without her, like the smile over the house had faded.
I spent time talking to my grandpa about Notre Dame ( he is a die hard fan) and sports and school. These were the same talks we always, but I cherished them more. The morning I was supposed to see my grandma, I was anxious. We had heard what to do and what not to do and I just wanted to see her.
Walking into her area of the hospital, I couldn’t of felt more lost. I looked over and saw my grandma and she looked at me and my brother, and looked away. When she saw my grandpa she said to him “Daddy” ( her nickname for him) and she shook her hands like she always had. My grandpa looked at her and his smile was from ear to ear. He said “ There’s the most beautiful lady in this place,” and I knew their love hadn’t died one bit. He sat there and sang her their wedding song, and I couldn’t help but smile too. As we sat there and talked to her I couldn’t help but be overwhelmingly sad. I missed having talks with her, and now it was hard for her to get her words out. Just sitting there with her was some of the best time I spent.
I’m not writing this to make anyone sad, even though here I am sad myself, I just want her story told ( even if it’s not the best). My grandma still has her fighting spirit. She has the same laugh, same smile, and same silly comments she just can’t quite comprehend them. Alzheimer’s affects so many people these days and it’s one of the saddest diseases. To forget everyone you once loved. My heart goes out to everyone who suffers with this disease and to their families. Remember that time is short. Our time we spend with people we love is short. Make the most of that time and always remember to love people in return. Just like my grandparents still love each other, love does not die, even if people change. Connie's kitchen is now closed.
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